that's what it's all about right? the pursuit.
finding what makes you happy beyond all reason and then doing whatever it takes to make that happen on a (hopefully) daily basis.
then why does the pursuit feel so damn exhausting sometimes?
i have no idea what i plan on doing with my life. no clue. sure, i have inklings, possible ideas, yet nothing seems to jump out at me. nothing feels like it could make me happy to the point of obnoxiousness. and that is, afterall, the point. to be so happy and fulfilled that others want to punch you in your face because you're so annoyingly peppy.
not that i'm not happy. i just want to find a way to make the pursuit feel much more worthwhile. i'm sure i'll look back one day and realize how monumental and life-changing everything was; realizing that everything happened a certain way in order to get me to the great place i'll be at that point. but is it too much to want a little more clarity? a dash more excitement to make things seem a little less mundane? i don't think so.
regardless...i'm thankful for the pursuit. i just don't want to waste the opportunity.
8.19.2009
8.11.2009
people person?
i have always considered myself a people person. i enjoy talking..a lot. i enjoy listening to others talk. it's fun to observe others and learn new things about people that are different from me. i feel that all of these things make me a pretty damn personable people person. (say that five times fast)
that is, of course, until i got a job dealing almost solely with the public.
working at a grocery store for nearly 4 years will give you a lot of experince with people. unfortunately, a chunk of that experience isn't exactly positive. slowly but surely, i've learned that in general, people are rather rude, insensitive and self-centered. not to say that i don't encounter some very great people while cashiering away my days, but let's be honest here: my job has vitually stolen my people person abilities from me.
people refuse to put their cell phone calls on hold for a minute twenty seconds so that i can finish their transaction. they think they're clever and use all sorts of "original" lines that, in their mind, makes my day. things like "oh, you were waiting just for me, huh?" or "well, you look bored. i'll help you out." then there's the creeps who must get confused and think they're at some dimly lit stripshow rather than a grocery store, because they feel the need to hit on me with ridiculous come ons. might i add that the majority of these studmuffins are old enough to be my father or even grandfather. and finally, those people that are just downright mean and rude for no real reason. i smile, i inquire about their day, i ever so gently weigh their produce as not to bruise them. and yet, somehow, i still become the person that they must unload all of their built up anger and aggression. and after getting shit on for a good six hours a day, you really begin to hate people in general.
this is why i'm a very different person outside of work. when i don't have to be in my work zone; the place where i have to care about every stranger's problem, every customer's happiness. the place where i have to laugh at every stupid "joke" that i hear twenty times a day.
don't mistake this bitterness for not being appreciative of my job. i know i'm lucky to have one and sometimes i actually happen to enjoy myself. it's those pesky people that fry my brain.
that is, of course, until i got a job dealing almost solely with the public.
working at a grocery store for nearly 4 years will give you a lot of experince with people. unfortunately, a chunk of that experience isn't exactly positive. slowly but surely, i've learned that in general, people are rather rude, insensitive and self-centered. not to say that i don't encounter some very great people while cashiering away my days, but let's be honest here: my job has vitually stolen my people person abilities from me.
people refuse to put their cell phone calls on hold for a minute twenty seconds so that i can finish their transaction. they think they're clever and use all sorts of "original" lines that, in their mind, makes my day. things like "oh, you were waiting just for me, huh?" or "well, you look bored. i'll help you out." then there's the creeps who must get confused and think they're at some dimly lit stripshow rather than a grocery store, because they feel the need to hit on me with ridiculous come ons. might i add that the majority of these studmuffins are old enough to be my father or even grandfather. and finally, those people that are just downright mean and rude for no real reason. i smile, i inquire about their day, i ever so gently weigh their produce as not to bruise them. and yet, somehow, i still become the person that they must unload all of their built up anger and aggression. and after getting shit on for a good six hours a day, you really begin to hate people in general.
this is why i'm a very different person outside of work. when i don't have to be in my work zone; the place where i have to care about every stranger's problem, every customer's happiness. the place where i have to laugh at every stupid "joke" that i hear twenty times a day.
don't mistake this bitterness for not being appreciative of my job. i know i'm lucky to have one and sometimes i actually happen to enjoy myself. it's those pesky people that fry my brain.
8.10.2009
why blog?
i start this blog, and i wonder to myself, why?
why start yet another something that i will most likely abandon after a couple of weeks. not to mention something that will probably never have any readers?
i've always enjoyed writing. throughout school, english was definitely my favorite subject and it is proving to remain that way in college as well. there is no way i could be brave enough to persue a career as a writer...mostly for the sheer fact that it is such an unreliable career. if i were to actually get noticed; get a job in writing of some sort, that would be amazing. if not, i could end up being a mostly unemployed writer and no one wants that. especially not me!
instead i chose to start this blog. recently i've become addicted to a couple of blogs i've heard about, and reading them has inspired me to attempt one of my own. granted, i do not yet have too many amazing life stories to tell, but i have my opinions, ideas and thoughts. many, many of them. and what's a better way to freely voice them all than through this lovely little blog?
so, if anyone happens to find their way to this blog, enjoy. hopefully i can offer a little humor to your day, if nothing else.
why start yet another something that i will most likely abandon after a couple of weeks. not to mention something that will probably never have any readers?
i've always enjoyed writing. throughout school, english was definitely my favorite subject and it is proving to remain that way in college as well. there is no way i could be brave enough to persue a career as a writer...mostly for the sheer fact that it is such an unreliable career. if i were to actually get noticed; get a job in writing of some sort, that would be amazing. if not, i could end up being a mostly unemployed writer and no one wants that. especially not me!
instead i chose to start this blog. recently i've become addicted to a couple of blogs i've heard about, and reading them has inspired me to attempt one of my own. granted, i do not yet have too many amazing life stories to tell, but i have my opinions, ideas and thoughts. many, many of them. and what's a better way to freely voice them all than through this lovely little blog?
so, if anyone happens to find their way to this blog, enjoy. hopefully i can offer a little humor to your day, if nothing else.
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